Goodbye Innocence

My heart is saddened and dismayed to find out that my first love has passed away. At only 36 he was taken from this world. There are so many things I could say about Richard Cooper Crosby- both good and bad. But for now, through tears of sadness and disbelief I will suffice it to say... I loved you with all my heart, thought we would grow old together - our separating was one of the hardest things I ever had to do, but I wish you were still here to be my friend. A little part of me has died with you. Like never before I choose to believe in God and Heaven and I pray that you are there. Goodbye Richard.

My modern little 4 year old talking international on his cell phone

It's Christmas time....

So it has been a long time since I have written anything and I think probably I will start writing more as I will probably have lots of free time on my hands now. Don't even understand people anymore. It seems like an entirely different world that I live in than the one I grew up in...I guess it is just my perspective that has changed. I truly never believed that people could be mean just to be mean and for no other reason. I have made lots and lots of mistakes in my life, but I never ever was mean intentionally trying to be mean. At least I don't recall ever doing it. I have been catty and bitchy but not mean for meaness sake. Whatever, I have got to move on and find a new project to keep me busy. I would like to take a moment and thank God for my children..they are absolutely the best thing I have ever been given. A gift that keeps on giving. I mean of course they drive me crazy sometimes and I never thought that I could literally go a year without sleeping through the night, but I have and they are getting older and I love them more each day. When they were born I instantly felt a primal urge to protect them and now I not only feel that, but I love them down to their very being and I LIKE them too. I am proud of them and can't wait to see what wonderful things they are going to accomplish in their lives. I know this is a bit rambly and I am sorry for that, but lately I have had the rug pulled out from under me and have gotten a bit down..but at the end of the day, if my children are safe and happy and protected I got nothing to complain about.

"We will all at some time in our lives, fall. Life is so very fragile, we are all vulnerable, and we will all at some point in our lives, fall, we will all fall.We must carry this in our hearts, that what we have is special, that it can be taken from us, and that when it is taken from us, we will be tested. We will be tested to our very souls. We will all be tested.It is these times, it is this pain, that allows us to look inside ourselves."

The New Arrival

Born 20 November 2008 - Andrew Clinton Magherini

Rainy Daze

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down- so it is pouring down raining in Florence this evening. I, of course, was hoping for one last weekend at the beach- but alas this is not to be...however, it is good as my very dirty car is being washed at the moment. So, what's up with you - nothing, what's up with you??? Have been watching lots of movies lately and reading books (that's what happens when your toddler stays at grandparents for the week!!) I just watched Keeping up with the Steins about this 13 year old boy who's parents are planning his Bar Mitzvah- I had NO IDEA that it was such a HUNORMOUS event. I mean I gave it the Catholic equivalent of a first communion but apparently it is a much bigger deal in terms of the "festivities" afterwards. Anyway this movie was quite good and had a nice cast- Jeremy Piven (who I love- PCU), Jamie Gertz (who I haven't seen since Less than Zero) and Darryl Hannah...nice mix. I liked it and even got a bit teary- but I think that is due to the pregnancy hormones and Madison starting "big boy school" next Monday. And of course this morning- one of my newer faves- BLADES OF GLORY with Will Ferrell and Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite)- super funny ice skating flick...check it out...I really want to see the new Ben Stiller film- my sister is already praising it. So this weekend will probably be pretty relaxed- I have relatives in from Atlanta tomorrow for dinner and not much else going on...will let you all know on Monday

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down- so it is pouring down raining in Florence this evening. I, of course, was hoping for one last weekend at the beach- but alas this is not to be...however, it is good as my very dirty car is being washed at the moment. So, what's up with you - nothing, what's up with you??? Have been watching lots of movies lately and reading books (that's what happens when your toddler stays at grandparents for the week!!) I just watched Keeping up with the Steins about this 13 year old boy who's parents are planning his Bar Mitzvah- I had NO IDEA that it was such a HUNORMOUS event. I mean I gave it the Catholic equivalent of a first communion but apparently it is a much bigger deal in terms of the "festivities" afterwards. Anyway this movie was quite good and had a nice cast- Jeremy Piven (who I love- PCU), Jamie Gertz (who I haven't seen since Less than Zero) and Darryl Hannah...nice mix. I liked it and even got a bit teary- but I think that is due to the pregnancy hormones and Madison starting "big boy school" next Monday. And of course this morning- one of my newer faves- BLADES OF GLORY with Will Ferrell and Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite)- super funny ice skating flick...check it out...I really want to see the new Ben Stiller film- my sister is already praising it. So this weekend will probably be pretty relaxed- I have relatives in from Atlanta tomorrow for dinner and not much else going on...will let you all know on Monday

Help me find a name for my baby NEMO

Here is the latest list (not in preferential order)

Mackenzie
Leland
Liam *
Riley
Miles
Nicolas
Allistair

Please vote your favorite name please....

Friday August 30, 2008

So what can I say-- August flew by and now summer is almost over (despite the weather conditions). I am hoping that I will have the energy to take Madison to the beach tomorrow, but I am not sure as my energy level is fading these days. Although if it is that or be annoyed keeping him indoors and out of his bedroom (that looks like Beirut in the 80's) then I might have to buck up. I found a hotel for about 100 euro for the night, but together with beach fees, dinner and lunch out, gas etc I am sure I would spend at least 250 euro (almost 400 bucks you Americans) for 2 days on the beach and I am not sure if that is in the budget these days. I will see tomorrow how I feel. On the baby side I am not 27 weeks..11 weeks to blast off...and feeling relatively fine. Meaning, I am irritable and bulky but on the medical side I am doing well except for my (thank goodness) low blood pressure- tonight I am planning on taking Madison to see Kung Fu Panda and am super excited about it-although it will be in Italian and not English - oh well hopefully it is dubbed well....Rock out...

TGIF ...

Ok- so I am at work and have lots of time to kill...it is 6.30 in the p.m. and I am ready to be outta here. So I had a doctors appointment this morning and baby #2 is coming along nicely...we are now at 22 weeks and tooting right along fine. That's good to here...makes me happy. Baby (shall I say "big boy" ) is at the grandparents tonight as mommy has scheduled a massage for tomorrow morning and babbo (daddy in eye-talian) has lots on the agenda tomorrow- I shall be joining them and the redneck pool tomorrow around lunchtime...I am not completely worthless!. I would really like to have some "adult time" (not what you are thinking) tonight- meaning go to the movies or something but my guess is we I will probably just collapse in the bed and read a book. I actually have to hop over to the ole Paperback Exchange (my previous employer) to pick up some beach reading for our vacation---YEAH!! we are leaving next Saturday for a week on the beach....I am planning on doing lots of nothing- relaxing at the beach, swimming in the ocean/pool-whichever strikes my fancy, eating lots of fish, and basically taking it easy- I am pretty good at taking it easy- it is a learned behaviour that however seems inherent in most Italians- they are experts in taking it easy. You think southerners are slow....you have no idea. You have not seen slow until you ask an Italian to do something-take my word for it. Enough about that....whatelse is going on with me these days?????? Hmmm....have been eating lots of ham and cheese sandwiches, I need to go to the store and buy mustard and ketchup though because we are out..I have taught Alessandro to love mustard and pickles- he never ate either one before he met me...think how much he was missing out on...come to think of it before that glorious fall of '96 when we met he had never eaten Chinese food! Much less Sushi or Indian...pointless to mention Cajun - which he of course loves. His most favorite breakfast item are my mamma's drop biscuits and grits...he still can't like French Toast (but I love him anyway) but pretty much devours pancakes...Madison is very into eating cookies and "splashing it" in milk in the morning. This is pretty interesting- my son as he is bilingual has a pretty unusual way of talking...I have to admit my coloquial speech and jargon from Baton Rouge probably doesn't help...but he pretty much puts and -ing and it after every verb...example
Wook mamma, Madison is walking it--(translation-Look Mamma, Madison is walking)
Wook mamma, Madison is singing it (Look Mamma, Madison is singing)
Wook mamma, Madison is dancing it...etc etc

And of course I don't correct him at all because I think it is cute...the strange things he says in Italian would not be particularly interesting for the majority of people who read this site as they probably wouldn't understand, but basically he used to (because he doesn't so much anymore) put the emphasis on the wrong sa-llyble...
Examples....
Ma-cchina
Gee-lato
Here again he was not corrected because his babbo thought it was cute.....recently though mostly he asks me if "baby is kicking it?"

It's a Boy!

The doctor confirmed it yesterday- we are having another BOY!!! Any suggestions for names are welcome- while Sled was a top favorite for our first child alas we went with Madison. This second go round it is even harder as it was hard enough to come up with a boy name in the first place....so far I like Riley, my grandmother and mother has suggested Grant to go along with the presidential theme- but as he was the leader of the YANKEE ARMY during the civil war - just can't do that. I also like Julian, Miles and Allistair...all vetoed by Alessandro...let me know your thoughts.

Ain't we lucky we got 'em

GOOD TIMES... I am so excited. I have found a way to watch full episodes of Good Times that I can watch on the computer...check it out... http://www.surfthechannel.com/tv/Good_Times/6e357fee80d062ac2dd6506e90ebc904.html

Very exciting- very exciting....I am thinking about ordering the first 4 seasons--not interested in season 5 and 6 as James has been killed off...and they get boring after that...did not realize that Thelma's name in one of the first episodes is Bern Nadette and in a later episode it is Bernnadette Stanis....hmmm did she get married or just change her "stage name"....things that make you go hmmmmmm.....I really really like this show, I think it is my all time favorite...followed by the Jefferson's, then One Day at a Time and then Three's Company...then The Facts of Life, and Different Strokes and the Brady Bunch. Come to think of it I watched a lot of TV when I was a child...I occasionally had to watch Sanford and Son in order to get to one of the favorites but it was not my favorite....any thoughts???

It is now 12 noon and still watching... I can't turn it off..........

Still watching

I am still watching "They Said What?" I am sooooooooooooo addicted....

Addicted

I am addicted to THEY SAID WHAT on People.com.....I have been watching it for like 2 hours straight....

Bored at Home

I have been put on "rest" - not "bed rest" but "rest" from work because I was having some painful cramps ....but now after 4 days I am SUPER SUPER BORED, not that I would prefer to be at work- however, I am now online watching People.com - which I find infinitely better than the magazine- since I can pick and choose without going through all the pages...I really like "They Said What?" which has what was said on Late Night TV which I obviously don't have here in Italy...really really funny. Sometimes, I feel like I am in GoodFellas how they only associate with other Mafia people- when you live in Italy- after 12 years while their behaviour is still bizarre and strange I have come to not understand it (for that I would have to at least have a lobotomy) but accept it as what they do....like this morning. I had to go have blood tests- regular I am pregnant blood tests- but in order to do this you have go to this clinic where they open at 7am but if you don't get there by at least 5.30am you have to wait for numerous hours...so I arrive at what I thought to be a reasonably early hour- 5.5o am and wait OUTSIDE ON THE SIDEWALK until 7am- at which point all these "elderly folks" who basically acted at if there were on the last leg--bolted for the number machine--I literally got pushed and thought I was going down...it was insane...nothing like socialized medicine...then I called because I need to make an appointment and today is June 6th and the first open appointment was in OCTOBER... I mean I am supposed to give birth in November....what good is an appointment I need now going to be 6 months from now I ask you....for all of those who think socialized medicine is a good idea- think again--at the end of the day I have to go private and pay out of pocket ANYWAY--thanks for taking 20% of my salary in taxes for nothing!!!

One of my favorite songs featured in one of my favorite movies- Valley Girl

Moving forward using all my breath
Making love to you was never second best
I saw the world thrashing all around your face
Never really knowing it was always mesh and lace
I'll stop the world and melt with you
You've seen the difference and
It's getting better all the time
There's nothing you and I won't do
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(You should know better)
Dream of better lives the kind which never hate
(You should see why)
Dropped in the state of imaginary grace
(You should know better)
I made a pilgrimage to save this human race
(You should see why)
Never comprehending a race that long gone by
(I'll stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(I'll stop the world)
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
(Let's stop the world)
There's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you
The future's open wide
(Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world)
I've seen some changes but it's getting better all the time
(Let's stop the world)
There's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you
The future's open wide
hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm
hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world)
You've seen the difference and it's getting better all the time
(Let's stop the world)
There's nothing you and I won't do
(Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you
(Let's stop the world)
I'll stop the world and melt with you...

Rainy Tuesday in Florence

So I am just back from the doctor's from the first "official" sonogram and even though we thought I was only 12 weeks the dimensions of #2 the revenge are that we are really 13 weeks and due on November 24th...very strange because I went to the hospital to have Madison on the 24th of November 2004- even though he was not to arrive until the 27th...I am quite freaking out for that because I don't want Madison's birthday to in any way get ruint by this baby- by the way if you don't know what ruint is look it up in the Meridian Ms Guide to past simple verbs.. (learned that word at Strong River in the 80's). Anyway, the weather is crap here today...rainy and cold...not like what it should be on May 20th ...and yes, for the few of you out there that attended it was 10 years ago this May 23rd that I wed the big Sandy....I have to admit it was the best wedding I have attended so far--including my sisters! Maybe I am a bit prejudiced on this one- but I had a great time, my friends and family had a great time and the FOOD WAS AWESOME! Now here I am 10 years later with 3 year old at school and his sibling for the moment making me look like lots of people do after Thanksgiving lunch...I will try not to talk too much about babies in the next 6 months as I am sure it will bore lots of you singletons and wocs, but that is a lot of what I am doing now--doctor's appointments left and right...Alessandro left today to go to Lecce which is at the very bottom of Italy for work and I really hate it when he leaves because at first I am relieved to have some space but I truly miss him when he is gone...and there is no one to take out the garbage either....just joking...it was a nightmare though because he left at 6am and then his plane had problems due to too much weight and it was storming here so he volunteered to get off the plane- then was bused to Bologna and just now flew to Rome and hopefully he is boarding the plane for Brindisi where he will then take a car transfer to Lecce---travelling to southern Italy is not easy! Maddy and I will miss him! Well gotta get back to work for now...

Guess What??

For all of those who still don't know...I am pregant with # 2!!! This is not him or her but a random sonogram picture of a 12.5 week old baby- I am right at 12 weeks so I thought it was appropriate... I am very excited and scared and nervous and overwhelmed and joyful and hormonal and emotional...I was telling my husband today about what the guards who watch the tomb of the unknown soldier have to go through to be worthy of their job and how even in the face of death refused to leave their post and I started crying. I am patriotic even though there are lots of things that American does that makes me angry mostly because I consider them un-American (like putting an Italian guy in jail just for visiting his girlfriend "too often" in Washington, DC- see the NY TIMES for the article) but I could never be as patriotic as these guys- in fact all military persons who risk their own lives in order to protect our country deserve our respect even if you are not in agreement with war- I truly don't think that anyone wants war- this is my opinion...anyway I digress...

Friday night ramblings and outrages!

Ok, so I am at work and should be working but as it is 10 to 4pm on Friday afternoon my mind is wandering. I am super bummed out because the weather forecast for this weekend and the next 10 days is rain, clouds and more rain! SHITE! I don't normally hate "rainy days and mondays" but with a 3 year old who is barely containable in open spaces the thought of having to be indoors for a weekend is horrendous..this means I will more than likely be forced to spend the weekend with my mother-in-law. This would not be as awful as it sounds, except that she and her "partner" (European word for man/woman who is not your legal spouse and you are too old to call them girlfriend/boyfriend--> for me it sounds like a same-sex word but I am adapting to the Your a peein' ways) are fighting a lot. Not like knock down drag out fights, but bitchy, wise-ass comments left and right and lots of voice raising (not uncommon for Italians) and it is doing my head in-- I am mean I have enough working with crazy eye-talians all week that I don't need it on the weekend.

ok so time is passing so slowly today that I feel like I am going to cry...ok so lots of horrible things have been happening in Italy lately- mostly in Sicily. I doubt this has made the NY Times but it should..three boys 15,16,17 killed this 14 girl because they claim that she was pregnant with one of theirs baby and was going to tell her dad- they took her to an isolated spot...raped her in turns then beat her beyond recognition of her own parents and then strangled her....they have now confessed and after confessing said "can we go home now?" What kind of animals are these people? I mean what is going on in this world-- horrible to have your child killed, but also think what it would be like to know that your own child was a HORRIBLE MONSTER who could kill another person and not even feel bad about it....I am shocked and feel nauseous. Another situation where a 20 year old man is taking phone films of sex with his 13 year girlfriend---hello are you INSANE?? What are you doing having sex with a 13 year old--that is called being a pedofile! I am very frightened for the world we are bringing our children into ....